As a Judge for the Woking Domestic Abuse Awareness Campaign I’d like to start off by saying domestic abuse thrives in silence. It grows in the shadows of fear, shame and isolation, and for too long, too many have felt they had no one to turn to. But recent campaigns, including the remarkable survivor-led initiative in Woking where I served as a judge, remind us of one powerful truth:
No one has to face domestic abuse alone.
The artwork chosen for this campaign a bold, hand-drawn illustration by a survivor, stands as a symbol of courage and defiance. As a judge, selected for my background and experience in the creative industry, I witnessed first-hand how art can hold stories too heavy for words, and how creativity can help survivors reclaim the parts of themselves that were once taken from them.
This is more than awareness. It is empowerment.
Understanding Domestic Abuse, Because Abuse Wears Many Faces
Domestic abuse isn’t always physical. It is any behaviour used to gain power, control, or dominance over another person. Knowing the signs is the first step toward safety and support.
1. Physical Abuse
Clear or hidden injuries, bruises, fractures or behaviour that causes physical harm. This also includes restraint, pushing, throwing objects, or threatening physical violence.
How it feels: Walking on eggshells, fear of anger, hiding injuries or making excuses.
2. Emotional or Psychological Abuse
This includes:
- Constant criticism or humiliation
- Gaslighting (making you doubt your own reality)
- Threats
- Breaking your confidence
- Manipulating your emotions to cause fear or dependency
How it feels: Confusion, anxiety, low self-worth, feeling “trapped” or “not yourself.”
3. Financial or Economic Abuse
Examples include:
- Controlling access to money
- Restricting spending
- Preventing work, or taking your earnings
- Creating financial dependency
How it feels: Fear of leaving due to money, feeling helpless, inability to make basic decisions.
4. Sexual Abuse
Any non-consensual sexual act, coercion, pressure, force, manipulation or exploitation.
How it feels: Shame, fear, guilt, confusion, but remember: it is never your fault.
5. Coercive or Controlling Behaviour
A pattern of domination using threats, manipulation and monitoring.
This includes:
- Isolation from friends, family or support
- Dictating what you wear, who you speak to, or where you go
- Monitoring devices or online activity
How it feels: You feel watched, controlled, isolated or scared to make your own choices.
6. Digital or Tech-Enabled Abuse
An increasing form of violence, including:
- Cyber-stalking
- Harassment
- Non-consensual sharing of images
- Tracking devices or surveillance
- Online impersonation or threats
How it feels: Fear of technology, anxiety when online, loss of digital privacy.
The Power of Expression & Healing Through Creativity
While judging the survivor artwork for Woking’s campaign, I saw something profound:
Art can be a bridge between silence and survival.
For many survivors, expression, whether through drawing, writing, dance, music, or spoken word — becomes a way to:
- Release emotions too heavy to carry
- Transform trauma into something meaningful
- See themselves as more than their pain
- Rebuild confidence and identity
- Find community and connection
The winning artwork reflected resilience: a woman standing strong, a symbol of defiance against abuse. It is a reminder that survivors are not broken — they are rebuilding.
And healing takes time.
Healing takes safe spaces.
Healing takes being heard.
Creative outlets can be those spaces.
Empowerment is not always loud. Sometimes, it begins with a pencil, a paintbrush, a journal, or the courage to share a story.
For Anyone Feeling Alone Right Now — These Words Are for You
“Your silence is not weakness. Your survival is strength.”
“You are not hard to love. You were just taught to love in a storm.”
“Reaching out for help is not giving up — it is stepping into your power.”
“You may not feel brave, but every small step you take is courage in motion.”
“You deserve safety. You deserve peace. You deserve to be heard.”
You Are Nor Alone – Reach Out, Speak Out, Get Help
Support saves lives. Whether you’re unsure, afraid, or feel trapped, speaking to someone you trust begins to break the cycle.
Help is available nationally and internationally.
Around the world, the United Nations continues to highlight the urgent need to end violence against women and girls. Learn more here:
UN International Day for the Elimination of Violence Against Women
https://www.un.org/en/observances/ending-violence-against-women-day
My Final Message
Serving as a judge for the Woking domestic abuse awareness campaign was an honour. I was selected not only for my governance work, but for my experience in the creative industry, and because I deeply believe that survivors deserve platforms where their stories can be seen, heard and respected.
